This is one of my favorite views in Juneau. No matter the time of year or the weather conditions, this scene has always left me deep in thought. Today is no different. You see, down below, deep in the fog, is my city. If you look closely, you may be able to make out some faint outlines of houses along the Douglas Island side of Gastineau Channel, perhaps enjoying a brief thinning of the perpetual fog of today.
It is quiet up here. I am the only one on this mountain. A sense of awe settles over me as I gaze on the cross, standing tall and in the clear overlooking this cloudy, damp town. It occurs to me that not just the city of Juneau has been plunged into the fog today. The whole world seems to be in chaos and confusion. The type of confusion that comes from not being able to see clearly. Kind of like being in the fog, I myself have experienced it recently. There is so much going on lately it's hard to make sense of it all. The little I can understand brings me a deep sadness. We live in a time of great uncertainty. Things/people/jobs that we have been taught to count on are changing or in some cases being ripped away from us. I have never seen a society more divided. A cursory glance at my social media feed reveals a glimpse into the depths of the envy, strife, misunderstanding, and many times thinly veiled hatred that has permeated our society. I mourn that part of this madness has even crept its way into my own thoughts.
There is one reason why this view brings tears to my eyes. I have a brief moment of clarity as I realize I have forgotten the cross.
The cross lifts us above the fog. It carries us out of the darkness below.
Down in the fog, living the day to day life is where I need to remember the cross most desperately. The cross is the answer to the confusion, the envy, and the hate that even relatively normal people like myself can feel building inside me at times.
The cross is my verdict.
What do I mean by verdict? Let's examine some of the reasons for all this fog. Why am I envious of others? Why do I argue and get defensive? Why do I get impatient with those who are closest to me? Why am I constantly worried about my life, my job, my money? And God forbid but why would I ever hate anyone? It's because deep down, at some level, I know I'm not cutting it. Oh sure, there are times where I feel like I'm accomplishing great things. There are times I feel like I'm advancing in my skills/learning etc. But it never lasts...there's a voice inside me that will eventually whisper "you aren't doing enough...you are failing".
I try to escape it. I find solace in seeking out the praise and admiration of people that I know and respect. It's great...for a while. Some of us may also turn to increasing our influence or power. Maybe that's why we hate. Perhaps we just can't stand anyone else having a "leg up" on us. So in order to be higher, it's easier for us to push others down. I know there are times I find myself chasing the beauty of this place that I live. There is peace and solitude here that soothes my soul. But the sad truth is that even these panoramic views that bring me such satisfaction begin to pale after a while and become normal, almost mundane.
The truth is, I think what all of us are looking for down there in the fog is for some ultimate authority to just look at us and tell us that we are good, that our work is done and it is perfect, that we are precious and valued.
The cross answers all these questions.
The cross says that our ultimate authority knows about that nagging voice inside that tells us we are not good enough. In fact the cross confirms that this voice is true. What horror right? But what the cross also speaks of is an ultimate authority who:
"...though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross."--Phil 2:6-8
The God from whom all of us, whether we acknowledge it or not, desperately seek approval, came down and fulfilled the verdict of that nagging inner voice. He stepped down into the fog and took on himself my verdict. Maybe it doesn't seem like that big of a deal...but I assure you, it's a cosmically big deal. We all want others to take responsibility for their actions. We want justice, for ourselves and for others. But you have to admit (at least I do) that cosmic justice may not be in my best interest.
But that's not all. We get the verdict that should have applied to him. This is what lifts me out of the fog! God smiles on me. Not because I'm special, but because, somehow, Jesus verdict gets applied to me. The ultimate authority can now approve of me because it's not my work that counts, but Jesus. In Jesus, I no longer need a "leg up" on anyone. I no longer have to get defensive, what am I defending? The work is done. Completed. Perfect.
I no longer have a reason to hate others. I no longer need to fear. I can call God my Father! What does it look like to really live this way? Let's read further on in Philippians, written by a man who fully embraced the cross:
"...But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith---that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead."
The cross lifts me out of the fog and lets me see things clearly. I can rest, in spite of the chaos. I can love, in spite of the hate. Jesus calls to you as well...can you see the cross? Spring is coming. Can you feel it?
